Birth Control and the Bible Belt

I’m pretty sure today is the day that it has hit me that I’m in Mississippi.

And it all revolved around birth control. 

I transferred my prescription from my CVS in Hipsterville to the only pharmacy, Walgreens, here in MS. Naturally, I did this online because it’s 2014 and that is my norm.

Two confirmation emails, and 48 hours later, I swung by the pharmacy to pick it up and the pharmacists looked at me like I was crazy.

“Your name again? Uh huh, birth date again?” she questioned me continuously. “You called this in?” “Well, no ma’am,” I practiced my southern manners. “I did the transfer online”.

“Oh, we don’t do that. We just call these things in around here,” she spoke sweetly. 

Wait, what. You have to physically call? And talk to a person? You don’t use the online transfer system that your national pharmacy has in place? Again, what?! Needless to say, I was shocked.

The pharmacist then proceeded to take down all of the same information I submitted online 48 hours earlier and let me know that it would be ready in about 30 minutes to an hour.

1 hour later, I check my email. YOUR PRESCRIPTION IS CURRENTLY OUT OF STOCK. 

DOUBLE U. TEE. EFF. 

They don’t keep birth control in stock?! That’s like the most common drug like, ever. So I called up the pharmacy to ask what was going on.

At first they put me on hold to check on the “situation”. Y’all. Christian music. Jesus Jams. That’s what was playing.

Needless to say I felt like heathen shit while I waited for someone to pick up the line.

“Yes ma’am! We don’t usually keep that in stock but we added it to our order and it is scheduled to come sometime tomorrow,” her thick southern accent elongated every vowel. “But that’s just when it’s scheduled… So in reality it may be between tomorrow and Wednesday. Sometimes it takes longer for it to get out here”.

Where am I? Mind. Blown. 

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